For many women today, these concepts would be horrifying.
Just the thought of trying to make their husband happy, even if they don't
have to work, is a big problem. "What kind of madness is this?"
they will cry out in pain. But if you step back and take a look at the principles
listed - are they ALL unattainable? All we need to do is
to replace the word "him" with "him/her." Now the feminists
can calm down, and their blood pressure will return from the stratosphere.
They will realize that they too, can receive kindness and consideration. Today,
there is a quiet exodus of college graduates looking at their current and
future lives, and discovering that a traditional role as a mother isn't
such a bad deal after all. In fact, many women have quit their professions
soon after entering them to become stay-at-home moms. They have found ways
to make it economically practical, simply by doing without certain
luxuries. These mothers realize the value of building a relationship with
their children - instead of their children building a relationship with
a day care center worker.
- As for my life - am I a hypocrite on these matters? No. My
wife and I refused to have "latch key kids" as they were
called 30 years ago. It was an expression describing children that
come home from school, and have door keys to get it. Then those children
wait another two or three hours for mother or father to come home. Yes,
money was tight for us and we did without trips to Disney world, 3,000 square
foot home and yearly cruises. Through most of our married
life we owned just one car. We live in a modest home we hand built ourselves,
and rented the first 10 years we were married. We have never regretted
any of this. Today, few people actually live within their income. They
*think* they can continue to refinance credit cards by moving balances
around. But this is equivalent to pouring nitroglycerine from one
container to another. The problem is that it's still there, waiting to
detonate. Many even foolishly think its fashionable to be in debt.
They will pay a terrible price for living this way, far sooner than they
think when detonation occurs. Even though the US government can spend more
than it takes in, we cannot. We can't print money.
- It isn't material possessions that make a marriage, but
pure love given unselfishly to one another. Making deals or social
bartering where if one does something, the other must do something
in return. This can rapidly escalate out of control. More than thirty
years of marriage has shown all this is true.
- And yes, I still cherish walking in the door after driving
38 miles home from work, and smell dinner cooking. The highlight of my
day? To see her smiling face, despite the intense physical pain she
suffers with every day from a serious illness - is both eternal and priceless
to me. I may be picked up one day and shipped to a camp, never to return
home or see my wife or family again. But the wonderful memories I
have for eternity? They can never take those memories away from
- Ted Twietmeyer
- I like the article, I'm going to send it to Monica -
she is the one who sent the first article to me. She had the same
feeling I did - that I wanted to be that wife that had dinner waiting and
looked nice when my husband gets home! What's wrong with that? After
working all day, he has to have something to look forward to!
- Dear Ted,
- I enjoy reading your input on Rense.com. Thanks
especially for your latest. I'd write more, but I'm getting ready
to go to FL to see my kids and the first grandbaby, born yesterday.
It is a relief to see what you have written, a solace to the heart to know
that that is still out there.
- Karen E.
- Hello Ted,
- I read your article with interest. It made me have
even more admiration for my own mother than I had previously. My
mom, who is now a very youthful 89 and still the backbone of our family,
was married for 57 years to my dad until his death 13 years ago.
She was a career woman extraordinaire. She was actually the main
breadwinner in the family. My dad made enough so that she didn't
have to work at all, but being highly gifted intelectually, she would have
withered on the vine if forced into the life you seem to think is the only
correct path for a woman who wants a family. Because of my mother's
efforts in the workplace, my sister and I were able to attend Catholic
schools where we received a superior education. My mom, because of
her high position in what was then the (name deleted) Company in Santa
Monica, was able to take off work whenever she needed to and was thus able
to attend all my school functions, and to serve on the board of directors
of the school (the only woman to do so, as this was back in the 60's and
- My sister and I became accomplished musicians as well
thanks to our mother's work. My dad was secure enough in his manhood
to feel not the least bit threatened by a high-achieving wife. My
sister and I became productive, law-abiding citizens. My sister,
in fact, became the homemaker you idealize. My mom taught us never
to denigrate the choices of another person, and most of all, never to denigrate
the homemaker. She always told us that, unless someone is paying
your bills, they have no right to criticize you. She herself was
criticized plenty for working instead of staying home, but she didn't worry
too much about that.
- I myself became an engineer. I also married and have
three grown children, who love me for who I am. They are all productive,
law-abiding people. The problems I encountered with them are not
very different from those of my sister, who never worked after the first
of her four kids were born. My husband, also an engineer, and I are
divorcing but remain best friends and will stay that way for the rest of
our lives. You see, he wants to spend his retirement in a place that
would be a slow death for me. We respect one another enough to allow
each other to do what will promote our mutual growth and well-being.
- What exactly do you know about Phyllis Schlafly?
When exactly in the midst of her domestic bliss did she have time to earn
a JD degree and become a prime mover in politics? Why do I detect
a bit of a double standard when it comes to this woman?
- Anyway, my point here is that no one would dream of telling
a man that he must be a plumber, or a lawyer, or a mechanic, or an executive,
but people feel quite free to tell women what they should and shouldn't
do. Very interesting.
- Thanks for taking the time to read my views.
- Take care, Karen E.
- Any woman (mother with a husband) worth her salt knows
she is the backbone of her household, her family and the next generation.
(A wise husband knows it too, and under his dominion, we are loved and
appreciated, not slaves to his wants.) A marvellous man, Peter Marshall,
sermon listed on the net, called married mothers Keepers of the Springs.
If it noted in this day and age, we truly know we are unafforable to any
business, because we do it all, all the time. Not for work, not for something
to do, but for love. Love of our Lord, our husbands (if we have picked
the right man) and love for our God given gifts, our children.