In national news of late
was a video of a bus monitor who was brutally harassed by students.
There is no need to re-iterate this story, but it does serve as an indicator
to show what's happened to American culture. Children probably little
better in Europe or the UK from news stories I've read over the past
years. Dressing children in uniforms is far from everything that needs
to be done.
In past essays I usually refrain from using words in capital letters
(yelling.) But the entire non-parenting genre' we have today has struck
a nerve. I'm shouting as I write this.
It was somewhat shocking to see the bus monitor incident happened in
the same school system where I "served time" during grade school. Yes,
because of constant teasing and hassles from other students, to me grade
school was like serving a sentence in a slammer. So bad it was, in fact
I never did buy a yearbook.
HOWEVER, neither I nor anyone else never treated our peers and teachers
the way today's children do. DISGUSTING to say the least. There were
NO BUS MONITORS in Greece schools until a few years ago. What is a bus
monitor's function? He or she functions like a peace officer. They must
do their job of keeping the peace without any real tangible authority
or a uniform. He or she is a mature adult who's function is to BABYSIT
about 30 spoiled brats - simply because parents are NOT DOING THEIR
JOB at home. That should be a crime in itself.
So parents, just WHAT have you been doing to RAISE and TEACH your children?
Based on the news story and many other sources, I would definitely say
BARELY ENOUGH. Don't write me whining how "oh, you don't understand
how my hands are tied" or other such drivel. You won't like my response.
Whether bleeding heart liberals want to accept it or not, at times a
child needs an ass beating or losing an allowance as a fine. I could
care less who disagrees with this but it IS TRUE. It's time grow some
balls and tell social services to get lost. Did the founding fathers
of America spoil their children? Now, they were often whipped with a
Hickory branch behind the barn when they needed it. I'm not promoting
child abuse, just use prudent discipline.
Get with it and stand up for your rights as parents and BE A PARENT.
Stop using fear of the government as an excuse for pathetic, delinquent
parenting skills. Books like Dr. Spock wrote, a man who never had children,
should be burned. Letters after someone's name mean nothing if they
cannot apply what they've learned. No one knows what it's like to be
a parent until they are one.
If AFTER you did your best as a parent and your child gets in trouble
with the law later in life, SO BE IT. You should NOT carry guilt for
their rebellious nature - the child should and learn from it. At least
you did the right thing raising them. BUT - if you are a delinquent
parent and are afraid to control or manage your child, and then the
child does get into trouble or becomes a pain in the ass to someone
else in life, it very well may be your fault. Did I get my ass spanked
growing up? You bet I did and deserved it every time. The learning value
of various forms of discipline were always clear to me.
Here's just a few of the things that create brat children who can go
on to become criminals:
* Failing to teach children RESPECT for their peers. This includes family,
relatives and teachers.
* Giving children whatever they want and not what they need. Being
a sucker for that old line, "I need a [cell phone/new laptop/etc....]
because the other kids have one. SO WHAT? The child will not DIE because
he or she doesn't have the latest technology. It's just another version
of "keeping up with the Jone's"
* Failing to teach children MANNERS. Yes, words like PLEASE AND THANK
YOU.
* Ignoring what children are doing both during school and after hours
outside of school, and who their friends are. A parent's job is to KNOW
what their children are doing and where they are.
* Give children CHORES to EARN their allowance. Chores are the MOST
IMPORTANT FIRST JOBS in life children have and serve as the foundation
for what comes later. If you give children a allowance without EARNING
it, this trains them to grow up thinking the world owes them whatever
they want. And when the world doesn't give them what they want? They
WILL steal it. And then you can go visit them through a window, and
take comfort knowing that any criminal record today, not matter how
petty the crime, means NO real good paying job will ever hire them.
Ever. A college education still won't guarantee them a good job after
graduation. Employers everywhere today check for criminal records.
* Using that pathetic cliche' to justify spoiling - "I didn't have things
a child, and I'm going to make sure my son/daughter has everything they
want. Dipstick, maybe you didn't have everything as a child because
your parents KNEW BETTER.
* If all these principles are not started early in life, then it's game
over for teen years and adult hood. A child's personality is just like
working with fresh concrete - you only have a limited amount of time
before it sets up. With children this happens in the first years of
life. When the teen years come along it's too late to change much of
anything. In many cases it will be the law that will force change. As
a parent you will NOT like the outcome of that.
* Not watching what they do on the internet. In pre-web days, porn magazines,
books and movies are kept out of the reach of children in stores. With
disgusting websites freely available now, a child's mind is quickly
corrupted. We cannot fathom the extent of the psychological damage when
children see or read this material and videos.
* A divorced parent may spoil one or more children in a pathetic attempt
to make up for no mother or father in the home. That parent can be assured
the WILL reap the rewards of such foolishness, far sooner than later.
Just because you're divorced does not mean special rules apply.
Many of these things and more have been taken away from parents by society.
Other parental responsibilities such as not spoiling children, assigning
chores, teaching manners and respect are no longer taught by most parents.
A parent is to give love and discipline as needed. There whould be NO
NEED for bus monitors and police in school hallways if parents do their
jobs.
Ted Twietmeyer
tedtw@frontiernet.net
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