- My head hurts like it's been shot through
with fire as I write this column, because every time I think forbidden
thoughts my brain gets zapped by the transmitter that was implanted in
my cranium by agents of the New World Order. But I'm going to write it
anyway, because the fate of the world depends on getting this information
- People look at me like I'm crazy when
I tell them about the transmitter in my brain, but they'll have to stop
snickering behind my back because now I've got proof. In the Winter 1999
issue of Paranoia magazine, there's a picture of the radio transmitter
that was placed in Robert Naeslund's brain. It looks like a little beach
umbrella. It was stuck in his head by the Swedish Security Police because
he was a threat to their secret mind control projects. And if the Swedish
police are doing this, you just know that the FBI and the Russians must
be doing it, too. Which explains those strange voices in my head.
- The FBI and the Russians are in cahoots,
part of the whole New World Order conspiracy that includes the Federal
Reserve, the Freemasons, the Bavarian Illuminati and the Bilderberg Group.
They're plotting to use the famine and chaos caused by the Y2K bug as an
excuse to take over the world by Dec. 31, 2000, and make every human being
carry a "Universal biometric ID card." And if you don't believe
me, you can read their secret plans in the March issue of Free American
-- the same issue that reveals that microwaved food is bad for your blood
and that bras cause breast cancer.
- You can't tell what's REALLY going on
in the world unless you read magazines like Paranoia and Free American
and Media Bypass. They aren't part of the elite media conspiracy. They're
published by "patriots" out in the heartland -- Media Bypass
in Indiana, Free American in New Mexico and Paranoia in Rhode Island --
and they've popped up in the last decade to blow the whistle on the international
mind control program designed to enslave us all. For instance, Media Bypass
reveals that the elections of 1992 and 1996 were "frauds" designed
to put a "CIA couple" in the White House. The whole thing was
arranged by the Council on Foreign Relations and the CIA with help from
the Rockefellers and the Rothschilds and the British monarchy. In fact,
when Clinton got his Rhodes scholarship back in the '60s, he pledged to
aid the Rhodes goal of "overthrowing the American Government and reverting
this continent and land mass to again being a British Monarchy colony."
- Free America reveals that all those FBI
and ATF agents who have invaded the mountains of North Carolina aren't
really looking for Eric Rudolph, the alleged abortion bomber. That's just
their excuse. They're really "TYRANTS preparing for war with the American
people." And the whole Monica scandal was just a "political smoke
screen" designed to distract the American people "while Clinton
and his cronies consistently and inexorably move us deeper and deeper into
the New World Order."
- That's scary. But not half as scary as
the Paranoia story called "I Was a Sex Slave for the CIA." In
it, a woman named Cathy O'Brien, author of "TranceFormation of America,"
reveals how she was imprisoned in "The Bunkhouse," a subbasement
room in the Pentagon, and used for the perverse sexual pleasure of high
government officials, including an unnamed former president. It was a horrible
ordeal, of course, but she did manage to come back with some important
information, including the revelation that UFO abductions are really just
cover stories for secret CIA mind control experiments.
- Sometimes, I read stuff like this and
I think, Hey, that sounds a little far- fetched. But then I realize that
I'm not really thinking that. The thought is being beamed into my brain
via the transmitter in my head. Which shows you just how far they will
go to stop the truth.
- The ads in these magazines are just as
important as the articles. There are ads for the secret cancer cure that
has been suppressed by the drug industry since 1934. And ads for dried
foods and "emergency survival tabs" that can keep you alive when
the Y2K bug ends civilization as we know it and the New World Order tries
to starve us into submission.
- There are also ads for books that the
big chain stores refuse to stock because they're in on the conspiracy,
too. Books like "Circle of Intrigue," which shows that "Ten
Unseen Men Rule the World!" And "Space Aliens From the Pentagon,"
which is the first book to reveal the secrets of the flying saucers and
their role in the "mind control hoax copied from the Third Reich,
covertly implemented through 'national security' meant to perpetuate the
coercive monopoly of a corporate-state elite."
- These magazines are absolutely essential,
and that's why it drives me wild when the clerk at Borders gives me that
condescending look when I buy them. I'm pretty sure he's a spy for the
New World Order and he's secretly photographing me. That's why I always
wear a ski mask and Groucho Marx glasses when I shop there. The clerk is
one of those young whippersnappers who wear their baseball caps backward.
Ever wonder why millions of kids suddenly started doing that? I suspect
the transmitters in their brains told them to.
- Lately, I've had a hard time finding
these magazines on newsstands. The last Media Bypass I could find was the
December issue. An accident? I doubt it. There are people in high places
who don't want us to read the truth.
- If the New World Order has cracked down
on your favorite newsstand, you can get in touch with these mags via the
Web. Media Bypass is at www.4bypass.com. Free American is at www.freeamerican.com.
Paranoia doesn't seem to have a Web site but you can subscribe by sending
$19 to Box 1041, Providence, R.I. 02901. The only problem is that your
magazines will be delivered to your door by a uniformed agent of the federal
government, which is pretty scary.
- Well, I gotta go now. My brain is smoking
from those shocks from that transmitter. Remember: If you hear that I had
a horrible fatal "accident" after this column came out, don't
believe a word of it. There are no accidents in the New World Order.
- © Copyright 1999 The Washington
- Keeping you informed with the latest
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